MAD MOMS – sample from the book
Chapter 1
„Sure, Snow White came back to life and agreed to marriage after a necrophile kissed her.
Honey, I don’t know what kind of idiot wrote this thing but life’s not like that. Women do
not come to life after being kissed. And then, getting married to someone who’s riding
around the woods alone and who’s kissing a girl in a coffin? Snow White was either mad or
still under the influence of the poisoned apple,“ Romana’s shaking her head, trying to make
the little version of herself, Romana junior, go to sleep.
„Mom, it’s just a fairy tale. They read them to us at kindergarten as well.“
„I keep saying they teach you all the nonsense. Good night,“ she give her daughter kiss on
the forehead and she’s falling asleep.
Romana is not going to sleep yet. She needs to make her deadline. She’s the chief editor of
national feminist magazine.
In the morning, she rushes to her daughter’s kindergarten. She’s driving like crazy. She’s
driving recklessly but she’s still late. She parks by the No Stop sign because it’s closest to
the entrance.
„This is not how it works here, Mrs. Kučerová. It’s after half past eight. We have to let the
kitchen know the number of children by quarter past eight. We cannot accept any more
children now,“ she’s being informed by a teacher.
„You bet you’re gonna accept her. I gotta go to work, I have no time for your nonsense. Go,
Romča,“ her mother gives her five hundred, „go get something to eat since they won’t give
you anything here.“
„Mrs. Kučerová, you do not understand, I can’t.“
„Fine. I’m calling your headmistress, I’m going to tell her how dissatisfied I am with you. I
will have your methods checked and I can also very easily have it so this is your very last
employment. Or we can do it the easy way, you tolerate my late arrivals, you will arrange
lunches for my daughter every day without the stupid announcements to the kitchen until
quarter past eight and we can live in perfect harmony. So what, do we understand each other
or not?“
The teacher’s silent. She’s new here. All her dreams about perfect job are coming apart. She
was expecting a cool time with kids, but did not count with some parents’ behavior.
Especially when it comes to Romana Kučerová. At the end, she just nods and takes Romanka
inside. Her mother smiles victoriously and struts back to her car.
Zuzana’s depressed again. She’s sitting on the couch, munching on chocolates and clicking
the TV remote control, hoping to find something that would quite the anxious feelings. Her
five-year-old twins, Adélka and Adámek, are luckily both asleep. They gave her a hard
time, especially during labor. At least now they’re model examples of good upbringing.
Every girlfriend could envy her how her twins are nice, polite, and helpful. Her husband is
also wonderful. Well, at least at first sight. He’s a lawyer specialized in international
business law. He works days and nights basically only sleeping at home. When he’s on a
business trip, he can be away for two weeks straight. Zuzka is desperate. The only thing she
ever wanted was a family life. She had no idea that a marriage o one of the best lawyers in
the Czech Republic would put her into a golden cage. She feels lonely and ugly. After giving
birth, even after she finished nursing, she never managed to get her pre-pregnancy body.
Maybe she would get fitter if she really wanted to, but she has no motivation. Whom is she
supposed to be beautiful for? She doesn’t go anywhere. She doesn’t even have time for her
friends now that she’s got the twins, and when she has a moment, she found out they don’t
understand each other anymore. Whatever. She’s fixated on her kids now and now she’s
living for them at least. She’s proud for how carefully she can bring the up. Her hobbies now
include possibly all the alternative method for good child development. She wanted to leave
the twins at home as much as possible. She wished to be able to cook them all the organic
foods and teach them good manners. She was convinced the society can ruin everything she
put into them. But then she had a crazy argument with her husband, and she gave in and took
them to kindergarten. She’s still mad at him for that.
Zuzka’s taking her kids to school. She’s glad the entrance is not blocked by the Barbie doll.
Every time they meet, she thinks how it’s even possible that someone so self-obsessed as her
can even bring up a child. Also, just looking at her body makes her self-esteem drop even
lower. She used to have figure like that. And now she’s mad that she belongs within those
obese greasy unhappy mothers ruined by motherhood and incompetence of the kids’ fathers.
Sometimes she wishes that his career would fall apart so that he could give all his energy
into his family. She knows that won’t happen though. He would still be more interested in
his career. Well, if someone’s family isn’t their priority it’s gonna be like that with or
without their career. She got pulled out of the cycling thoughts by a leaflet given to her by
the teacher. It was advertising Christmas party.
“We’re still looking for volunteers. We would be happy for you to sign up. We already
announced it a week ago, but no one signed up yet.”
That’s exactly what she needs right now. At least it’ll give her something else to think about.
“I’d be happy to help.”
Then Aneta interrupts them: “Wow, a Christmas party. I’ll sign up as well. Nobody told me
about this, it’s gonna be great! We can work on it together!”
Zuzka smiles slightly. Everyone around here knows famous Aneta Svobodová. She’s a
blogger who pretends to be a Super mom. That’s even what her t-shirt says: “I am SUPER
MOM, I love my SUPER KIDS.” This acting like a mother of the year is kinda off-putting.
If you want to be a capable parent, you don’t need a thousand likes. She herself as an
organic and eco mother gives children more than posts for bored people.
“Perfect. I’ll sign both of you up and then give it to the headmistress. I’ll print out an
information sheet for you so you know what is expected, what the preparations should be
like and so on.”
“Fantastic,” Aneta smiles and takes a photo of the leaflet about volunteering. The teacher
disappears into the classroom and moms stay alone. “Shall we take a picture together?” she
asks more or less rhetorically because she’s already setting up her cellphone.
“For goodness’ sake why?”
“I’ll post it on my social networks, that we’re gonna be working together on the party.”
“We don’t even know what we’re gonna do yet.”
“That doesn’t matter. Come on, smile,” she takes her around her arms and takes a selfie.
“What your Instagram and Facebook handle?”
“I don’t have Instagram, on Facebook I am Zuzana Novotná but I barely use it.”
“How come?”
“Well… My husband doesn’t like when I post pictures of our family. I protect our privacy.”
Aneta raises her eyebrows and then smiley effortlessly: “I see. Can I use this picture? Don’t
worry, I’m not gonna tag you.”
“Well, ok.”
The headmistress stayed exceptionally overtime. There’s a problematic mother that she
would like to clear some things with. Not only does she mess with the attendance but she
even threatens the new teacher with ruining her career. That’s the peak of impudence that
she will not tolerate any longer. When Romana comes to pick her daughter up she’s met with
an unpleasant surprise.
“I need to talk to you. Sit down, please, this is important.”
“It’s about the young teacher who just finished her internship?”
“That young teacher’s name is Karolína. She has 5 years of experience. This is her third
month and we are very happy with her performance and commitment to the job.”
“What is this about then?”
“I don’t like the way you treat Karolína. I don’t like that you’re always late and that you’re
not able to respect the school operating rules. You know, we are prestigious kindergarten
and we are not used to such humbug.”
“Isn’t this more personal than that?”
“Of course not.”
“Well I don’t see any problem in ordering lunch for Romča automatically whether she comes
or not. That way it won’t cause you any trouble if I come a few minutes late.”
“We do not make such exceptions here.”
“And what if I write a very favorable article about your kindergarten?”
“Are you trying to bribe me?”
“I am only negotiating. We are two influential women so why won’t we meet somewhere in
the middle?”
“Ok then. I can turn a blind eye to your being late, if it’s not going to become a rule. I can
always count with your daughter for lunch, whether she’s here or not. You write the article
that will make us look better than we actually are. However, I will sign you up for the
organization of our Christmas party. We already have two mothers signed up so you will not
be alone
“I don’t have time for that.”
“Don’t worry, you can include that in your article.”
Romana hesitates but eventually agrees, “alright then.”
